Many admired people throughout history have empowering nicknames to describe or define them: Richard, the Lionheart; Catherine, the Great; Joan of Arc, the Maid of Heaven.
I'd like to add another great to this collection of admirable people: Mary, the Bold. This particular Mary is not known through history nor all corners of the earth. But for those privileged to know Mary Katherine Anthony Davis, they know she is humble and would never use this word to identify herself. But she is, indeed, a bold woman. And whether she chooses to take credit or blame, I get a great deal of my boldness, truly my essence, from the bold woman she is, as was her mother before her.
From Mary, the Bold, I learned to be less sensitive to negativity. I learned to be compassionate. I learned to speak up, not only for myself, but for others and most importantly, my faith in God. I learned to try anything and everything, even if I failed (and I did!) But I prefer to try and fail than not to try at all. That inclination is not natural, at least for me. Yet she always encouraged and supported me to try my best. She wasn't some delusion stage mom of failed American Idol-wanna-bes. She would tell me the truth. But she never discouraged me from attempts. And more than that, I saw her step outside her own comfort zones, risk going outside of herself, and try bold things. I admire her so deeply for that.
I have learned, I hope, how to be a good friend, a good sister and cousin and aunt, a good wife, a good mom...not from lectures but from observing her bold and intentional and deliberate actions. I have seen her encourage people in their worst moments and in their best. I have watched as her gift of hospitality and generosity play out over and over and over, without a thought to what it may look like to anyone else. I have seen her stock a freezer full of food and have an open-house mentality to her children's friends for years with such joy. I have watched her invite strangers to stay in her home without hesitation.
I have seen her independence and security in her relationship with her husband. She empowers him to pursue his interests without worrying about a nagging session awaiting him. I have watched in awe and wonder as she and my father have boldly and beautifully walked out their marriage thus far, with some really challenging moments, in grace and dignity. They are not codependent, but rather two complete, whole individuals who choose to travel through life and love together. They do not "need" one another. They can each function. They can be apart for hours and even days without falling apart. They choose to WANT each other. And after 45 years, that is a bold love.
I am quirky beyond all reason. I make her shake her head on a regular basis. I have always been, well let's just call it spirited and individualistic, to be nice... But I am confident in my quirkiness BECAUSE of her. It took a few decades to become comfortable in my own skin, but she never encouraged me to be anything other than who God created me to be.
And so, Mary, the Bold, I celebrate you. I honor you. I respect you. I appreciate you. And I miss you this Mother's Day. Above all, I love and admire you.